The other day my 9-year-old son asked what exactly people celebrate during a “celebration of life.”
I thought it was a great question — something I hadn’t thought about, even though I’ve attended many such celebrations before.
I explained that it varies depending on the situation. If the person believed in an afterlife, we’re celebrating their passage to a better place. If the person had been ill or injured, we can celebrate their freedom from pain. And if the person had cultivated a life full of loved ones, we celebrate the impact that person made in their world and what they meant to everyone in it. Sometimes it’s an amalgam of all these things.
That’s what was on my mind Saturday when I attended a celebration of life for my friend Steve Vericker, a desert radio host and local personality.
When I moved to the Coachella Valley in 2005, I worked for the daily newspaper. My job was in the features department, writing lifestyle stories and my own weekly column. I worked hard to make a good impression; this had been a big move across the country, and Palm Springs both awed and intimidated me. I desperately wanted to carve out my own little place in it.
However, there was a popular morning radio show that eviscerated my column every week. Absolutely ripped it to shreds. And the more I pushed myself to be cool or impress readers, the more it altered my voice. Months after my arrival, I was mocked, miserable, and wracked with self-doubt.
An email from a stranger
That’s when I received a message from Steve Vericker (known on the radio as Steve Kelly).
“I want to get you on my show,” he said. “Let’s talk about some stories you’re working on and show people who you really are.”
Keep in mind, I didn’t know Steve. I hadn’t yet met Steve. But somehow Steve knew everything. He understood I needed a life preserver, and he made a point to be one for me. So I went on his show. I chatted about who I am and what I write, and it restored a lot of my confidence.
To this day, I’m still touched by his gesture. It was a generous use of his platform and a real gesture of kindness at a time when I didn’t see much of it elsewhere. Not only was Steve great at helping out fellow journalists and creating valuable networks, he was very good at being kind.
Many years later, our friendship well established, Steve popped into my inbox again. This time it was to say he was proud of me for getting quitting alcohol. He told me that he’d been dry for decades, and he credited sobriety with saving his life.
“I promise you, life only gets better,” he wrote.
So that’s what I celebrated on Saturday during Steve’s celebration of life — the gifts he so freely gave, the way he reached out whenever life was hard, and the promise that things always get better.
•••
Steve’s ashes will be spread by his family and close friends in Ireland. If any of you are ever in the Emerald Isle, I hope you’ll think about his generosity of spirit, and it’ll inspire you to pass along a small kindness.
The guide prepped us with a countdown of “Three, two, one …”
Instantly, we were plunged into the blackest darkness I’ve ever experienced. A darkness so complete, it felt thick. I put my hand in front of my face, and not only was I unable to see it, I wondered if my hand still existed.
Just when I felt like I might be falling through space, my son wrapped his arms around my legs. A moment later, the guide turned on the small lights that illuminated the path.
I quickly reoriented myself. Ahead of me, cave. Behind me, cave. Above me, you guessed it. Cave.
It’s a good thing I’m not the kind of person who gets claustrophobic in confined spaces. Rather, I’m the kind of person who, when faced with darkness, potentially loses their own body.
I was standing in the deepest point of Mitchell Caverns, an adventurous Southern California road trip destination within two hours’ drive from Barstow and a fun add-on for camping trips in the surrounding area.
The caverns are named for Jack Mitchell, who bought claims to the land and sounds a bit like a sunbaked, desert version of P.T. Barnum. Back in 1934, he and his wife, Ida, built stone structures by hand on the property and ran a small resort that included tours of the caves. They also developed the road that led from Route 66 to the caverns, approximately 22 miles, and turned it into a popular attraction.
On view are two main caves: “El Pakiva,” the Devil’s House, and “Tecopa,” named for a Shoshone chief. There’s a third cave, but it’s deep and dangerous, and at this point it’s off limits to the public.
The tour enters through the “eyes of the mountain” and only becomes more spectacular from there.
The caverns feature some unique and unusual formations, and our guide was excellent about explaining them. I knew about stalagmites and stalactites, but I had no idea that so many cave features are named for food! We saw cave bacon, cave frosting, cave mushrooms, and cave shields — “they’re kind of like a sandwich,” our guide said.
Overall the caverns were more impressive than I expected, a true gem within the California state park system.
GO SEE IT
Where: Mitchell Caverns is located in the Providence Mountains State Recreation Area in the eastern Mojave Desert.
When: The State Park is open Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays, and holiday Mondays from September to June. (Closed July and August.)
You must have a guided tour for the caverns. Reserve this by calling (760)928-2586 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. on Mondays. Group size is limited to 15 people.
What time: Tours are approximately 2 hours long and take place at 10 a.m. in June and September, and 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. during the other months.
Cost: Tours are $10 per adult, $9 per senior, and $5 for children. There’s also a $10 State Park fee per vehicle.
Bring: There’s no gas or food located within many miles of the attraction, so make sure you have everything you need to fuel yourself and your vehicle. For the tour, you can take a water bottle, but no backpacks or snacks.
Good to know: The bat population is being decimated by white-nose syndrome. It’s a fungal growth that does not affect humans, but humans can carry and spread the spores, and the spores can survive for up to a decade. For that reason, the park requests that whatever you wear to Mitchell Caverns, you never wear into another cave. (So if you have plans to visit another cave soon, this is a great excuse to buy new hiking boots!)
Accessibility: The location of the caverns do not allow for trails to be ADA accessible. Also, the cavern formations create areas as low as 62 inches and as narrow as 14 inches. There are video tours of the caverns that can be viewed inside the visitor center.
I hike a lot, but I tend to stick to the same trails. I’m sure there’s a metaphor there.
So I set a goal to hike 52 different trails this year. Part of that was to force myself out of my comfort zone, but I think it’s also necessary for Covid times. Even though I can’t travel far, I still want to explore, I want to have new experiences, and I need to feel like I’m having an adventure.
It’s important for me to cultivate that for my 6-year-old son as well.
At the same time, we want to be safe and maintain distance from others, which is an additional bonus of 52 different hikes. Although I ticked some popular hikes off my list this month, I think this will push me to find some lesser-known trails and ultimately explore my area without encountering a lot of people.
Here’s how we did in January:
A few things to keep in mind: • These hikes are family-friendly, meaning they were good for my family, but these trails are not necessarily accessible for things like strollers. • I’m strategic about when and where I hike. Some of the popular trails get a heavy amount of traffic throughout the day, and I don’t feel comfortable on narrow paths with people who might not be wearing masks. Those are the trails we hike at dawn. • Don’t take my distance as gospel. Hiking with a 6-year-old child involves a fair amount of wandering, so your mileage might vary. • In each case, I’d recommend checking a site like AllTrails for current trail conditions. I always look the map to get an idea of the terrain, and I read the most recent comments for any pertinent info. • Please wear a mask when you encounter others on the trail.
Bighorn overlook, Rancho Mirage • 1.3 miles
We kicked off the new year with a quick hike to watch the sun rise over the valley.
There’s easy-peasy parking at City Hall, and the hike is a mild, half-mile jaunt up to the overlook, which connects to other trails.
Bogert Trail, Palm Springs • 1.8 miles
Bogert offers a pretty overlook of south Palm Springs and leads to junctions with several other trails. We opted to do this as a moderate loop, with the first half on the mountain, the rest on residential streets.
Randall Henderson Trail, Palm Desert • 2.8 miles
This one is a favorite, and we’ve been doing it since E was just a wee little guy, so I think it’s appropriate for many ages.
The trailhead begins at Friends of the Desert Mountains. The visitor center and parking lot were closed, but parking is available across the street or along the side of the road. (It is a very busy road, though. Be careful.)
Oswit Canyon, Palm Springs • 3.2 miles
I love Oswit Canyon, and I’m grateful to everyone who worked hard to save it from becoming a housing development.
This hike is particularly great during covid times, because there’s not one particular trail that takes you back into the canyon. Basically everything is a trail, so you can really maintain distance from other hikers.
It’s also a gradual climb (you don’t even realize you’ve gained elevation until you look back), and it feels like a real escape from the rest of the world. Bighorn sheep sightings are not uncommon.
Fish Traps Archeological Site, Thermal • 1 mile
This wasn’t much of a hike, but wow, was it cool. We found petroglyphs (and modern graffiti, sadly), shells, broken pottery, and best of all — hundreds of fish traps! Yes, in the desert.
Back when ancient Lake Cahuilla was here, the Cahuilla Indians crafted these ingenious stone traps to catch fish. You can learn all about that here.
Goat Trails, Palm Springs • 3.2 miles
These trails go on forever and branch off into multiple other trails, and I don’t even remember which path we took. Only that we reached an old horse corral that I’ve never seen before, and it was in the middle of nowhere.
This area is heavily trafficked, but the first section is wide. Then once the trail begins to branch off, it’s easy to maintain distance from others.
Earl Henderson Trail, Palm Springs • 2.3 miles
When I first moved to Palm Springs, I ran this trail multiple times a week. Unlike a lot of other trails here, it’s hilly; not a relentless, glute-killing climb. It’s also in the shadow of the mountain, so it remains cool on hot mornings.
Mission Creek to Stone House, Mission Creek Preserve • 3.6 miles
Mission Creek is a dreamy place, often overlooked in favor of other parks and preserves, and that’s fine with me. My son could spend hours tossing rocks into the creek, floating leaves in the water, falling off logs into the mud.
The main path will take you along the creek, next to desert wetlands that are popular with birdwatchers, and past historic structures to the Stone House. (Believe it or not, this used to be a dude ranch/resort.)
The trail near the Stone House links up with the Pacific Crest Trail, so you can pull a Cheryl Strayed and just keep going if you want.
Hidden Palm Oasis, Thousand Palms • 3.8 miles
This hike’s name is no joke. You’re walking along a bleached, somewhat barren landscape, then you head down a slope and SURPRISE! A hidden palm oasis. And it’s glorious too. Cool, breezy, a nice stop for a snack.
We’ve also seen a lot of horned lizards on this hike, and we love horned lizards for being the most metal of all creatures. Here, I’ll let you see for yourself.
McCallum Trail, Thousand Palms • 3.4 miles
This out-and-back trail at the Coachella Valley Preserve will take you to a large pond that is fed by underground springs (the result of seismic activity along the San Andreas Fault). Kind of. Right now the pond is closed due to desert pupfish reintroduction.
We continued beyond the pond toward Vista Point and Moon Country trails, then decided to save Moon Country for another day.
I always get a thrill at the beginning of this hike, which starts by the now-closed visitor center. An elevated wooden platform leads you through a marshy oasis with small ponds and shaggy palm trees. It looks and feels otherworldly, like Ewoks might hop out of the trees.
Bump and Grind, Palm Desert • 4.3 miles
This moderate trail is great for some serious exercise, but it’s also uncomfortably crowded. I once saw an entire bachelorette party on the trail — Mardi Gras beads, water bottles with penis straws, bridal veils and satin sashes, the whole bit.
We hiked this loop at dawn, and it still had too many hikers for my taste. On the plus side, this trail branches off into some other excellent Palm Desert trails, it offers a picturesque view of the town, and it’s easy to find and centrally located.
The top is closed every year from February 1 to April 30 for Bighorn sheep lambing season. We lucked out and made this hike on Jan. 31, so we were able to do the full loop. My son struggled around the 1-mile mark, but we took it slow and made frequent stops until we made it.
We just moved into a new townhouse, and I love it. It’s like a 1970s Palm Springs dream home, and every day it makes me feel happy just to walk in the door.
However, with every new place comes things both good and bad. Even dream homes.
(Warning: Grainy iPhone photos ahead.)
GOOD
A weird atrium in the middle of the house. Look at all the sunlight! And rocks galore!
BAD
We have nothing to put inside this atrium except a cactus that looks like a penis.
GOOD
Carpet! No more incessant CLICKY-CLICKY-CLICKY of dog nails hitting the hardwood.
BAD
Brown.
GOOD
Microwave! After four years of deliberate, microwave-free living, I was secretly excited to see our kitchen cabinets were pimped out with a microwave.
BAD
It doesn’t work. Of course it doesn’t. Look at it. It’s from the Smithsonian Museum of Appliance History.
GOOD
The guest room has a Murphy bed. And as someone who has watched many a comedy film, I know that Murphy beds mean one thing, and one thing only. Hijinks.
BAD
What the hell could be bad about a Murphy bed?
GOOD
The guest room also contains a built-in desk. And a chair too. This room has everything!
BAD
When we moved in, there was a pair of old, pink panties on the chair.
Nearly every time I go out for a morning run, I see a double-decker bus jammed full of tourists with fancy cameras. And then I have to stop and let them take my photo and it’s totally embarrassing.
No, that last part is not true.
The bus full of tourists part, however, is real. And it got me wondering, what in the heck are they looking at?
I already knew this central Palm Springs neighborhood is home to swanky digs and architectural gems. And I knew celebrities and Hollywood legends made this area their playground. I just didn’t exactly where, who or what.
So I did some googling and came up with a list of addresses. (This Southern California hiking site was a tremendous resource. Thanks!) Then I grabbed my iPhone for some jogging and shooting.
This is not a comprehensive list by any means. They’re just some of the fun celeb homes I run past every day. (OK, OK. Three times a week.) And I still have at least a dozen more to photograph. So stay tuned for part 2!
Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell • 550 Via Lola
This house is one of my favorites. Doesn’t it look so breezy and fun, just like the stars who lived there?
Debbie Reynolds • 670 Stevens Road
This house is perched on top of a tiny but steep hill. If you hold your computer up to your ear and listen hard enough, you might be able to hear me wheezing.
Elvis Presley • 845 Chino Canyon
Unattractive black fence. White rocks that look like the bubbles on a stagnant pond. CREEPY ELVIS FACE. What’s not to love?
I’ve heard a lot of people say this home is tacky, but I think it’s a charming, unapologetic throwback. Living here would be like having Tomorrowland in your living room.
Marilyn Monroe • 1326 Rose Ave.
This home wins the prize for the most difficult to photograph. It’s located surprisingly close to the street and isn’t gated or anything. But there’s SO MUCH SHRUBBERY. And I always seemed to be there when the sun was in the worst possible position. So excuse the weirdo color — but it just adds to the classic 1950s aesthetic, no?
Otherwise, it’s an adorable little home. I can easily imagine Marilyn padding around the yard in a silky robe with sexy bedhead.
Nat King Cole • 1258 Rose Ave.
Again, there’s a whole lotta landscaping goin’ on.
Ronald and Nancy Reagan • 369 Hermosa Place
Stately, conservative and totally California. I would expect no less.
Clark Gable • 222 Chino Dr.
Frankly my dear, I do give a damn. It’s just so pretty! And pink!
Sammy Davis Jr. • 444 Chino Dr.
The parties that must have gone down here. Can you imagine?
Cyd Charisse and Tony Martin • 1197 Monte Vista
Dean Martin • 1123 Monte Vista
Katharine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy • 776 Mission Road
I didn’t want to run up to the gate and stick my phone through the fence to get a better photo. Especially since someone was home at the time. Just trust me, this house is everything you’d expect of Katharine the Great.
Sydney Sheldon • 425 Via Lola
Undergoing a second draft.
Howard Hughes • 335 Camino Norte
What? You can see the home of a famous recluse from the street?
NO! Of course not.
There’s actually a great big wall around this place, bigger than what you’d find at most prisons. But I jumped really high, held my phone up in the air and hoped for the best.
Liberace • 1441 N. Kaweah Road
I love this place. I mean, not for me. But it’s so … Liberace, all the way from the lion statues to the piano mailbox.
Coming soon: Jack Benney, Zsa Zsa, Frank, Bing and Lucy!
