Pregnancy Week 26: Is this normal?

March 30, 2014

It’s the final week of the second trimester! The exciting thing about week 26 is that we’re far enough along, the baby will likely survive if he is born right now. (But please stay in there. Keep baking, little bun.)

We have also entered double digits in the countdown to the due date, which is ridiculous. This is all happening so fast! I have to graduate in June, and I have a thesis to finish! And there’s still so much I need to prepare! I’m sure I’ll feel differently soon, but right now I envy the elephant and their 22-month gestational period.

Why can’t I be you?

 

This week The Husband and I celebrated our anniversary — 11 years together, four of them married.

March 28, 2010. It was a nice day for a white wedding.

 

I can’t help but look at photos of us and daydream about the fat, happy baby we’re going to produce. What’s he going to look like? Who is he going to be? What will he enjoy? What traits will he take from me and which parts will be from the man I love?

I just can’t wait to meet this kid and find out.

Ingredients in the genetic soup.

 

Typically The Husband takes a belly photo of me on Sundays to post here, but we’ve both been writing and working all morning, and I haven’t showered yet, let alone put on real clothes. So we’re back to the dreaded bathroom selfies! I took these earlier this week because I was feeling pretty good about my fly maternity outfits. (Please excuse the toothpaste dots on the mirror. I rock my teeth like a hurricane.)

I tied a ribbon to show I still have a waist somewhere there. Also I was wearing cute tights and boots.

 

When bumblebees get knocked up.

 

Here’s how everything is stacking up this week:

Baby: We’ve officially entered the ugly vegetable stage. The baby is as long as a green onion, and the size of a head of lettuce. He’s also about two pounds, has eyelashes, and his little heart is holding steady at 145 beats per minute.

My body: I might write a book about the physical effects of pregnancy called, “Is This Normal?” since so many things this week had me running to the Google machine to ask that very question. Stabbing pain under my left shoulder. Is this normal? Tender right rib that feels bruised. Is this normal? My belly skin is too tight and might rip apart like the Hulk’s clothes. Is this normal?

The thing is, the internet is no help when it comes to medical issues, because I end up sucked into a black hole of rare diseases. Yesterday I logged on to WebMD with a totally normal pregnancy and logged off with leprosy.

This is why I’ve actively avoided reading most pregnancy books. I feel like my body instinctively knows what to do. I don’t need to read about all the complications that might occur. Not yet. (Then again, maybe a book might have told me that the pain under my right rib was just the baby’s foot.)

On a bad note, I had a little lecture from my doctor for gaining a couple pounds more this month — literally a couple — than my target weight. I’m still feeling good, though, I’m on track for overall healthy weight gain, I can still cross my legs and everything. And my goodness, a couple pounds could be poop.

See? They didn’t factor in poop.

 

Exercise: Beyond the shoulder/rib/skin discomfort I mentioned above, which has been very minor and temporary, I feel terrific. I have a lot of energy. I haven’t been sick or crampy. I’ve been walking every day and doing yoga a few times a week.

When I had a massage in Mexico, Arturo the masseuse rubbed my thighs and said, “Have you noticed your legs getting stronger and stronger during your pregnancy? You’re all muscle,” which made me feel really good. I like knowing that I’m building a strong, solid foundation for birthing.

Nursery: I think I’m supposed to be doing something with this room now? I’d like to be one of those women with hand-painted stencils on the door and a cool mobile above the crib and frilly curtains and everything artfully arranged, but that’s just not going to happen.

All I know is that I have a crib, a lovely gift from my mother-in-law, and the baby won’t have to sleep in the bathtub.

Welcome to MTV’s “Cribs.”

 

For a while I was reading a lot about Montessori nursery design, which doesn’t use a crib, just a mattress on the floor to allow the child freedom of movement. Then I started getting overwhelmed with all the other options, which include co-sleepers and bassinets and everything else. And you know that moment when too many choices actually becomes paralyzing? That happened.

I finally decided if we really want to do a floor bed, that’s something we can implement later. Same with a co-sleeper. Right now I just want a safe, rectangular space where I know my baby can sleep — and just having it brings some peace of mind.

Food cravings: Clementines. Hummus. Peppermint tea.

Predictions for my child’s first words: Any combination of “cat” with “No!” “Stop!” “Get down!” “Out of the kitchen!” or “Really?”

Thing I was called this week that I do not wish to be called ever again: Big Momma.

 

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